For Teens

For Teens

I'm not that much older than you. I've just come from where you're headed—to college and into the real world. Straight up, life after high school can be awesome. Even though I am done with the drama of high school, I remember how hard it is to deal with parents, teachers, friends and academic pressures—which is exactly why I have dedicated my professional career to helping teens navigate these challenging years and why I wrote How to Deal; A Teen Survival Guide

Basically, I compiled everything I have learned about dealing with life—and deal with it successfully—in this book. I can teach you how to elevate your mood and feel better regardless of what you are currently dealing with—even family and peer problems. Better yet, you can learn from (and laugh at) my mistakes and misfortunes. Being that I have just come from where you are going, what you learn will help you through high school, into college and just with life in general.
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Dr. Weichman's Tips

From both personal and professional experience, providing teenagers access to the tools I teach lends for a less turbulent adolescence and a smoother, more confident transition into adulthood.
  • How to Deal with Social Drama
    • What goes around, comes around. Period. Remember that the way people negatively treat you will no doubt come back to them in life. You do not need to do anything about righting the times when you are wronged by a friend. Life will take care of it for you.
    • See people for who they are. The people that bully others, brag about themselves, or show off their material things usually feel pretty small.  Their behavior is their way of overcompensating for a sense of inferiority. Bottom line, there is no need to be negative, angry, or talk crap about someone if you are feeling good in your life. Instead of feeling hurt or intimidated by people causing you drama, try to see who they really are and feel pity for them because they roll through life this way.
    • Focus on what counts.  It is really important that you identify the positives traits about yourself and keep that in the forefront of your mind at all times. When you do this, you realize you are the 'whole package.' Once you identify and believe this, when people don’t see you for who you are--when they accuse you of being something you are not, exclude you from something, or cause other social dramas--you will be able to see that it is their loss and can move on while holding your head high.
    • Friends will come and go throughout your whole life.  A friend is someone with whom you have things in common. You are on the same page in life. But similar to how a snake sheds its skin as it grows, when you begin to grow up and define yourself so do your friends.  Often you do not end up in the same place. Don’t freak out if you start to lose some relationships. Often times, this is part of how it goes and you need to focus on maintaining relationships with people who have more in common with you.
  • How to Deal with Parents
    • Don’t bite the hand that feeds you. Keep in mind that when it comes down to it, as annoying or frustrating as your parents may be, you need them right now. They provide you the basics to survive.  Parents put a roof over your head, give you food, clothing, and may even pay for some of your college education. If you keep pushing against them, you will get less from them in return and in general, life at home will be more difficult.
    • Dealing with your parents is similar to a boomerang.  What you throw into your relationship with your parents is often exactly what you get back. You can’t control what happens but you can control your reaction. If your parents piss you off and you melt down on them, your parents are going to come down harder on you, which screws you. However, if they do make you angry but you manage to react favorably, parents tend to take a step back and usually will hook you up with what you want. Play the game the right way and you will be happier.
    • Stay calm. If you flip out, start yelling and having a teen tantrum when things are not going your way with your parents, you can forget about having an opportunity to get what you want. When you flip out, your parents are going to either elevate and yell back, get defensive, or simply just shut down. You have to stay calm, rational, and try to create the most mature response possible in order to achieve your objectives.
    • Remind yourself that this is all just temporary. These years feel like the toughest time of your life. You are old enough to do your own thing but still have to listen to parents and follow their rules. It’s frustrating but is not forever. Remind yourself that this situation is temporary. You are paying your dues just like everyone else and just know that the ability to run your own life is coming faster than you know.
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